It Was Everywhere

His sweet darkness
and the blind way
I stumbled into it,

not knowing
which way to go.

Nevermind
the circumstance,
the fingers of heaven

circling my wrist.
The strong kiss
promising pleasure

against my throat.
The wanting.
The wanting.

© 2006 Lisa Zaran

I Have Counted All Your Wants,
I Have Charted All Your Needs

It is easy
to make love
in the intimate
darkness of evening.
When
the only light
is from the long,
soft lashes of the
moon's pedestrian
eyes.

Your weight
lowering gently.
Your mouth
and all of
its madness.
Your tongue
like a white flame.
Who needs electricity
when the touch
of your hand
can open
infinite sunlit
windows in me.

© 2006 Lisa Zaran

Reveling In The Moment

Sometimes I forget the world
propped at the foot of the sun.

I forget the sky, that ceiling
of stars I could touch with my hand.

I forget the past. Those years I
could lay open but could not face.

How easy it is to forget
each muddy road, each regret,

though the dirt from both
is still rising behind me,

a great cloud of dust.
My childhood body

diminishes and it is
just me, a grown woman

walking in and out of love,
heart and mind dotted

with scars, forgetful of everything
or none of the above.

© 2006 Lisa Zaran

All or Nothing

I am your enchanted mistress.
The one with the copper tongue.
The one who grows pink carnations
for your breakfast.
The one who decorates your spine
with kisses.
A chime on your subconscious mind.
The one who nestles beneath your sternum,
mute as a stone, hungry as a lung, 
full as a heart full of red blood love.
I am all or nothing.
The lifeforce behind your fluttering hand.
The stereo beneath your ribcage.
I am the mouth, the eye, the ear,
and the open pair of legs
to every thrust you have ever thought
to commit or conceive of.

© 2006 Lisa Zaran

On One Condition

Everytime I think I will finally turn away from the institutional gestures of my past, the barred windows, chain locked doors, the promise breakers of my ragged youth, the urban myths that have become my bedtime stories, the fables which imprison me like Jonah in the fish, yes, everytime I begin to believe in freedom; to leave no thin strings between us, I hear my Father, whom my soul loves with all of its heart and purity, speak to me: On one condition. Say yes.

© 2006 Lisa Zaran

Blue Eyes Flaunting Great Seas of Knowledge

If only I didn't love you so much.
You are in my heart.
You are the keeper of my heart.
You are the sunlight seeping through
the windows of my heart.
You are the violet I think about
in my heart.
You are the veil of lust falling across
the face of reason in my heart.
You are the tenderness I feel inside of my heart.
You are the cry of desire rousing me from the dark
crime of loveless sobriety in my heart.
You are blue eyes flaunting great seas of knowledge
pounding waves throughout my heart.
You are the bony hand of masturbation in my heart.
You are the wet carnation of aching want inside of my heart.
The ragged purple thorn of out of control desire
pricking my bottom, the heavy smell of stainy love
in the bedroom of my heart. 
You are the kiss of spring come morning
with sleepy lids and stubbled chin.
You are the stone curfew I rely on,
the shooting star, the wound I can't put a name to.
My mind is dead, my soul is lost, my heart is all.

© 2006 Lisa Zaran

Happiness    

Happiness, make me a promise
bright as a cherry.

I want a ceremony.  Somebody
to send invitations to.  Open skies
to gaze upon.  A galaxy of stars.
Men, dressed in white tuxedo's
behind the bar.

I want a hairdo that will set the night
on fire and a red dress.
Maybe some of that
cold confetti rain 
falling down.

Happiness, I know about your reputation.
How you slide out of the room 
after everyone's had a few drinks.

How you attempt to make amends
but your hands are frozen and your lips
are blue from grinning.

Happiness, you're like a piece of fruit,
you bruise too easily.
If I could just grow you in the palm of my hand,
I would.  

Happiness, you decide.
Teach me how to smile.
Show me what it means to laugh like a child.

This isn't a popularity contest.

Happiness, can I be your imaginary friend?
Dragging behind you from town to town.
When you stand up, I'll lie down.

Happiness, I want to learn a new skill.
Can you show one to me?
I'm tired of dodging bullets, landlords and suv's.
Come be my motto.  My melody of splendor.

I can see it so crystal clear now.  You and me
in our palace of joy.  Our aluminum hideaway.
Molding our minds together while outside the gray
world keeps at it.  Misery that is.  The opposite of us.

Happiness, I wonder, do you even exist?
Or are you just some figment of my imagination?
Is that you I think I feel scuttling across the surface
of my enchanted heart?

Hey happiness, let's make a deal.
You stick around, I'll quit crying.